I had an extremely upsetting conversation with the STBX a few nights ago. If you’ve ever dealt with a narcissist, you know they talk in circles and thrive on confusion. If you don’t, allow me to introduce you.
My STBX makes a hearty 6-figure salary with regular, normal, pay checks. I am a full time author. I literally never know when I will be paid, or how much I will receive. It’s a job that relies on faith, tenacity, and occasionally, Ramen noodles.
The STBX will have zero trouble receiving a new mortgage after the divorce. I, on the other hand, must take extra measures to convince a bank I actually do have a reasonable income - it’s the delivery that’s WILD. For this reason, my lender requested a signed copy of the separation agreement before providing me with a pre-approval, which I need to begin house hunting.
The separation agreement is an official document outlining all the things verbally agreed upon before the judge during pre-trial last month. Yet STBX hasn’t signed.
Meanwhile, our home went on the market and sold within a week. The buyer requested to take possession on June 15.
Problem: I cannot leave without somewhere to go. I won’t have somewhere to go if I can’t house hunt. I can’t house hunt without the pre-approval. You see how this is going.
I very actively avoid conversation and eye contact with the STBX, but this turn-of-events forced my hand. And I asked if he would please sign the separation agreement so I can move forward on my end.
These were his responses.
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